Mom Stories

I’ve been texting my brother this morning about some Christmas returns that we need to make.

Then I told him I have a new computer and wondered if he wanted my old one.

“Yes!” he texted, “if mom doesn’t give it away first like she did the last computer you gave me.”

I forgot about that.

I gave him a computer a few years ago and mom saw it in her house and gave it away to someone else.

She’s been known to give away some pretty big things.

Several years ago, she really wanted a dog.

My aunt and uncle had a shitzu that she adored. She decided she had to have one. “They’re such cute little things,” she said. So she asked my aunt and uncle if she could have one of their puppies next time their dog had a litter.

She was so excited about getting one of those cute little puppies. She waited for it to be born, debated names for it, and counted down the days until she could welcome the furry little pup into her home.

When the day finally arrived, she quickly developed pet buyer’s remorse. It was too much work, needed potty training, and so much attention.

She didn’t have the patience to for it, so she abruptly gave it away.

My sister’s friend wanted a dog so that was the perfect solution. She packed up the dog and all its belongings and off she went to hand it off to someone else.

“I’ve never been so relieved in my life, ” she said, “I can’t have a pet. They are too much work and a pain in the neck. Remind me next time I say I want a pet that I really don’t.”

A cat showed up at her house a couple years later and took up residence there. She tried not to feed it and make it feel at home so that it would return to its owner, but it never left.

So, she started to feed it and care for it and finally decided to adopt it.

“Mom, remember you don’t want a pet. You asked me to remind you that you can’t have pets. They are too much work.”

“I know but this cat is different. It’s here all the time anyway. I might as well take care of it.”

Then, one day she got tired of it.

In fact, I had proof of her pet meltdown on my voice recorder.

She didn’t realize she was still being recorded after she left me the message to call her back, so I heard quite a rant about her “damn cat.”

“Oh, you little beast,” she screamed. “Stop wrapping yourself around my ankles every time I turn around.  Oh, stop it! You’re driving me crazy! I can’t go anywhere without you following me and thinking you can just wrap your furry little self around me every five minutes!”

Knowing her track record with pets, I knew the cat was on its way out.

When I called her back, she said, “I couldn’t stand that cat for one more minute. So, last night I called Becky (my pet-loving cousin) and told her I was bringing it over to her house. It was late, and I was in my nightgown but I couldn’t even wait until morning. I just scooped up that little beast and drove it over to Becky’s and said, ‘here! It’s yours now.”

“I’ve never been so relieved in my life,” she said.

(Except when you gave away the dog, I thought, but did not say.)

A few weeks later, mom’s neighbor came over to her house and said, “I haven’t seen my cat for a few weeks. She used to hang around here a lot. Have you seen her?”

Ah oh.

Yes, she gave away the neighbor’s cat.

We have devised a plan for the computer. I will label it with my brother’s name and he will not leave it anywhere in her house where she can see it because you never know what she’ll decide to give away.